Whoremoans (say it fast)

Things that have gotten me mildly choked up lately:

1 - The end of last week's "Big Love"
2 - Two or three songs from "Jacques Brel is alive and well and living in Paris" and "Jesus Christ Superstar"
3 - Half of Carole King's "Tapestry"
4 - Checking myself out in the locker room mirror in Danskin workout leggings and a tshirt from ninety or so pounds ago and now resembles a "Flashdance" shirt
5 - Shopping with my Mom today

Things that are puzzling:

1 - How I can buy obscure cookie ingredients at the supermarket and forget cat food
2 - Why I have a Palm Pilot at all and whether I should sell my laptop or not (that I am typing on right now)
3 - Why I am slightly fatter on one side of my body than the other (along the vertical axis not horizontal) and why working out makes that more prominent. Seriously what the eff is up with my arms?

I need to menstruate and soon. For real.