Other stupid shit I did this weekend

Got sick (see previous);
Slept through a movie I'd already paid for (@#%@ Fandango!);
Tripped and fell so hard into my bed that I got huge bruises and damaged a couple of blood vessels in my leg;
Closed two of my fingers into my front door;
Ate too much food.



Some things don't change. Some do.

I did this little quizlet almost nearly a year ago. So? I don't know, I can't sleep. Deal with it, campers.

Updates in bold.

1. Spell your first name backwards: ellehciM

2. Story behind your journal name: It's a variant of a phrase that my friend Janet and I developed to describe something quite different. In other words, a long complicated private joke that means nothing to you.

3. How old are you: 39

4. Where do you live: NY, NY


5. Wallet: Black Fossil leather checkbook wallet, stuffed with business cards, receipts, courtesy cards but rarely money which usually goes in my pockets. I'm getting better about keeping cash and cards and change in the wallet, but now the checkbook is getting shredded.

7. Toothbrush: Gray and black Crest bendy ergonomic one. I should get a new one
Cheap green 'crest' toothbrush, from the dollar store (Hence the quotes), not intentionally bendy. I shold get a new one.
8. Jewelry worn daily: Platinum diamond engagement ring on the wrong hand. Weird stone and silver ring I bought at the Clearwater festival. Diamond is in storage.

13. Sunglasses: If I wear contacts, I wear cheap off the street plastic ones. I just busted my $5 oversized '60s ones that I loved. I've worn glasses nearly exclusively this year, so no shades, unless I'm in 'character'

14. Favorite shirt: Either my black vneck sweater or my LL bean grey and green mens flannel.

16. CD in stereo right now: Booty Olympics "Boystyle" Beethoven something, I'm too wrecked to get up and check.

17. Piercings: Two in each ear.

18. What you are wearing now: Above-mentioned LL Bean grey and green mens flannel shirt. Striped high cut briefs. Grey JHU tshirt and Pfizer sweats.

19. Wishing: I could get off my ass and my projects and problems would magically disappear. The same, and sleep.

20. Wanting: Elves. Lots and lots of elves. Smaller tonsils.

21. After this: getting off my ass. taking meds. maybe cereal. Sleep?

22. If you could get away with it and murder anyone who would it be? Can't abide murder, unless someone hurt a friend or family member I would kill to defend them.

23. Persons you wish you could see right now: Hmm, there's a few.

25. Something you're looking forward to in the coming week: My friend Mike is coming to town. Everyone's coming to town. And I have some big shows.

26. The last thing you ate: Last night i had hot and sour soup. Besides Claritin and Klonopin I had a tangerine.

27. Something you are moderately afraid of: Moderately? Uncertainty.

31. Do you believe in love? Yes, much to my detriment.

32. Do you believe in soul mates? Goddamn, I hate that word. No.

33. Do you believe in love at first sight? I'm not sure that's love, but it's something.

35. Do you believe in God? I don't know, really.

38. What is the longest you've ever watched TV? Oh, dear, mindless marathons have trapped me...

44. Who is someone that you really wish was still around? My great-aunt.


45. Who are your best friends? I have a few. Not all of them are geographically close. Some are moving farther away, and that's bumming me out.

46. How many people have you kissed? There's kissing and then there's kissing.

47. Would you be in a long distance relationship? Oy vey. Perhaps. I like space. Not unless I'd fallen madly in love.

48. Still have feelings for anyone you've been in a past relationship with? Oh of course, who doesn't? Although at least one ex says I don't have nearly enough; he tends to hang on to nearly everyone in some form or another, I really don't. Yes.

49. Do you know what it feels like to be in love? I'm pretty sure I do, but recent life events have caused me to wonder. Shit happens. But yes, I think I do. I don't know.

50. Would you sacrifice your favorite possession for your best friends? Of course.


51. Where is your favorite place to shop? J. Jill catalog. Bloomingdales on sale if I have the right salesperson; otherwise Filenes Basement.

52. Have any tattoos? No.

61. Do you do drugs? Rarely do I do illegal drugs.

64. What are you listening to right now? Oddly nothing, although Foreigner's "I want to know what love is" is going through my head right now. Nothing.

65. Who was the last person that called you? My friend Mike about his travel plans for this week. Frank.

66. Where do you want to get married? Vegas, drunk. Ha! Of course I am still technically married right now. Alas.

68. What would you change about yourself? Be less angry at myself and more focused on positive changes in my life.

69. What are essentials in your life? Cash, family, friends, Internet, carbonated water. No carbonated water, and not in that order.


71. Hair: longish, curlyish, dark brown, messy

72. make-up: None. I haven't showered yet. Worn off by now.

73. music: Maudlin shit. Just put on Steve Earle. Musicals. Les Mis, South Park, Moulin Rouge.

74. mood: tense cranky

75. State of Being: uncertain fluish


in other news

I'm sick. I went from 0 to fucking sick in an hour. My throat is swelling up, my eyes are burning. And I'm starving, which happens when I start running a fever. Goddamnit. This officially sucks camel balls.

Camel balls?

I gotta get some rest.

TV Women who May be Retarded (with all due respect to the retarded)

1. Kina from "Real World Road Rules: The Duel" and such. "I'd have won that challenge...if it wasn't for my body." Clearly, all her cranial blood supply is cut off at her gums.

2. Rachael Ray. "Yum-O!" And why are her breasts so forlorn?

3. Kendra from "Girls Next Door." Go Kendra, before it gets away!


Another ESPN gem

Lest you think that chick sportswriters can only write about chick stuff, here's another gem from Jemele Hill.



Why me? Why does weird shit happen to me?

I'm nursing what I believe is a dislocated jaw. Either that, or a recently relocated jaw that hurts like a bastard. What was I doing to earn this? Street fight? Stage combat gone wrong?

Nope. Chewing.

In my heavily scarred life, I have, among other things -
- run a screen door into the back of my foot
- gotten a shard of cadaver in my eye (while wearing glasses)
- burned my stomach on a cookie sheet
- slipped and fell INSIDE A HOSPITAL dislocating my knee
- fallen down subway steps (6 train)
- gotten a concussion from an improv show
- face-planted while leaving the stage at the Parkside

Now, I've dislocated and relocated my jaw (I think. It's starting to swell, now that I've removed the icepack). I didn't know whether to call the doctor or dentist, so I called the dentist.

I feel like a moron. A moron in huge amounts of pain.


Clam up, noseface!

I really enjoy the Comic's Curmudgeon; so much, that I am considering buying an 'air quotes' tshirt.

It's selective in its likes (Curtis) and dislikes (scathing serial commentary on For Better or For Worse). It's got neat archives that are fun to browse, especially if you are a recovering strip junkie like me.


Sense memory

I never considered myself a touchy person, in terms of touchy-feely-ness. But there are some touches that I remember, years later, so vividly that it makes me shudder a bit from how real and beautiful it was.

The feel of someone's hands on your shoulders as they gaze intensely into your eyes, deeply, perhaps for the first time, as you look up at them. The caress of someone stroking your skin, remembering how soft and pretty it's always been, as trees rustle on the breeze blowing in. The wonderfully uncomfortable sensation of resting your head on someone's shoulder and having a hand play in your hair, absently, while focusing on something else. Having your hand, squeezed, in a gesture of "I'm here and I like this." A leg tangled up with yours as you drift off to sleep.

Quality, not quantity.

arrrrggghhh (a fair amount of time in the making)

I just want someone to fall madly and truly in love with me, and be able to follow through in a way that doesn't make me insane, annoyed or heartbroken.

To quote the legendary Harvey Fierstein, "Is that so wrawng?"




I started to post about my lovely weekend, and somehow don't remember what happened to the post.

Anyway, it was lots of fun.

But I'm so behind on THINGS.

I also notice that there's a certain lack of personality, or at least consistency, in this bloggero.

Does anyone care? Nah!

Bahahahahah. I'm working too late and have miles to go before I sleep.


Icky in Pink

ESPN, and especially Page 2, are my frequent workday companions. I'm a great fan of Mary Buckheit and Jemele Hill, two fine chicks whose sportswriting I admire.

Today's Page 2 featured them both:

Lighter Reading (Mary Buckheit on sports-'fashion')
Heavy Reading (Jemele Hill on Katie Hnida's rough times in NCAA football)

Great stuff.


Yeah, I'm hot. Or at least toothy!

See previous, or Beauty Products Revisited

Yesterday, I bought Aveeno Exfoliating Body Scrub and Vaseline Intensive Care Firming Lotion.

I have no idea if this stuff works. Yet I felt a profound need for it.

I will keep the public informed as to my smoothness and firmness.


This was the week that was

Let's take advantage of how scatterbrained I am. I kept meaning to post, but it's hard to type unobstrusively here at work (yes, I'm working today) and it's the last thing I want to do when I go home.
Some highlights:
  • The world's worst comb-over.

  • Don't drink and...drink.

  • I am a GrownUp - Shopping at Duane Reade for products by Brand, that May not Be on Sale, and May be for Women over 30.

  • Comedy - Oy Vey!

  • Obsession: or, why must all my list contain an Odd Number of items?

Enjoy your day! Here's a couple of tapirs for you: