Use the Force (and lots of craft glue)

This was too adorable not to post. (L-R) Princess Leia, Yoda, Lando Calrissian. I proudly constructed the Lando cape. Neat, huh? (I take no responsibility for the jerri curls.)

Information, please.

The most uselessly generic phrase in the English language is "Take care of yourself." Meant figuratively, it's usually a kiss-off bye-bye when you're walking away from someone you'd rather not have run into. Meant literally, as when said to someone who's sick, it's a paradox. On the one hand, no shit. On the other hand, if the sick person (who happens to be a type A control freak asshole) knew how to do that, they wouldn't need you to tell them to. So as such, without elaboration, "Take care of yourself" means nothing to me. I mean, the generic 'me.'

Seriously, how does one do that?

It's the most wonderful time of the year.....

These...these are my people.

From Cousin Stephanie:

An elderly Polish man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite pierogi with fried onions wafting up the stairs.

He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs.

Downstairs, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen, where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were hundreds of his favorite pierogi.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of love from his wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

He threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the pierogi was already in his mouth. With a trembling hand he reached up to the edge of the table, when suddenly he was smacked with a wooden spoon by his wife.


'Back off!' she said. 'Those are for the funeral.'

Whatever. Yes, I'm lazy.

These are a few of my favorite things.

You were in the show?

Yeah, I was in the show. I was in the show for 21 days once - the 21 greatest days of my life. You know, you never handle your luggage in the show, somebody else carries your bags. It was great. You hit white balls for batting practice, the ballparks are like cathedrals, the hotels all have room service, and the women all have long legs and brains.

- Crash Davis, "Bull Durham"

I got a new haircut yesterday.

This is what I look like:

On the slightly lighter side...

As much as I try to stay apartisan (is that a word? Scrabulous is down, dammit), I found myself enjoying this little lefty blog.

I think Political Improv is making me a better citizen.

Anxiously await your thinly-disguised show plug.

History.

This is heartbreaking.

Music, music, music

Honestly, I've tried to like Bruce Springsteen. I've tried. But the only song I really enjoy is "Born to Run." Sung karaoke-style. Even "Jersey Girl" is tons better as sung by Tom Waits. Maybe it's a geography thing. Maybe, as a Long Islander, that regional-man-music square millimeter of my brain is firmly occupied by vintage (pre-Uptown Girl, naturally) Billy Joel.

I can't help but like Cat Stevens. I find his voice weirdly soothing.

Try making a 'Bob Dylan' station on Pandora. You'll get lots of mildly maudlin, somewhat soothing, acousti-men, bluesy-folksy-lyrical music. Johnny Cash, Townes van Zandt, Steve Earle, Cat Stevens. I've nixed out the Everly Brothers, Paul Simon (too maudlin even for me), and of course the "Boss."

Ooh, and the odd protest song! Woody Guthrie, of course. And now, Phil Ochs singing "I Ain't Marching Anymore." Why don't we write protest songs like we used to? Pete Seeger can't live forever, literally. (With apologies to my most Rabbity friend.)

I'm at work. Thank you, Pandora Radio, for keeping me amused, and allowing me to influence the base-pairing of the so-called 'musical genome.' Whatever that may be. I'm fixing to nix some more Bruce.

More about me!

1. If you saw my legs, you would think I was an extra in Law & Order (Maybe I should send a snap to Central Casting). I've got stripey bruises from riding in my uncle's fishing boat and knocking into stuff, and new roundish bruises from I don't even know what. And although the insect bites are starting to heal, they are pretty scabby red. Since my blood's 'thinner than onion juice' I have to be concerned about spontaneous, slow-healing bruises.

2. To my great consternation, I noticed this morning that one of my giant cans of GNC protein powder (purchased on sale naturally) was laden with high fructose corn syrup. Health, shmealth! Back to Spirutein....if I didn't feel compelled to use all this crap up first.

3. I'm still at work, and my boss just called and interrupted my train of thought (such as it was). Oh well.

Trauma!

I found my first gray hair today.